Mental health in Asian American communities is complex, layered, and often silenced. For generations, many Asian families have internalized the belief that emotional expression is a sign of weakness—or worse, selfishness. Mental illness is not named; it is hidden behind phrases like “just tired,” “too sensitive,” or “not strong enough.” These cultural norms don’t emerge in a vacuum. They are born from histories of immigration, war, displacement, and survival.
What we often see in therapy rooms today is the aftershock of these histories. Asian American individuals—especially children of immigrants—frequently carry the emotional weight of intergenerational trauma without having the language to articulate it. This might look like anxiety that manifests as overachievement, depression hidden behind people-pleasing, or chronic guilt for setting boundaries with parents who sacrificed everything to come to this country.
What Is Intergenerational Trauma in Asian American Families?
Intergenerational trauma refers to the psychological effects of trauma passed down from one generation to the next. In many Asian American households, this includes the legacy of colonization, war (such as the Vietnam War, Korean War, or martial law in the Philippines), and migration under duress. These traumas are not always spoken about explicitly. Instead, they show up in family dynamics: parents who struggle with emotional regulation, an emphasis on perfectionism, and cultural taboos around discussing mental illness or seeking therapy.
The Role of Filial Piety and the Eldest Daughter
Filial piety—a Confucian value embedded in many Asian cultures—emphasizes respect, obedience, and duty to one’s elders. While this value can foster strong family bonds, it can also create internalized pressure, especially for eldest daughters. In therapy, many eldest daughters describe feeling responsible for their family’s emotional stability, finances, and reputation. This burden can lead to burnout, identity confusion, and difficulty expressing their own needs. They’re praised for being selfless, but inside, many feel lost and unseen.
Why Stories Matter in Healing
Healing intergenerational trauma begins with naming it. Storytelling becomes a culturally responsive mental health tool—particularly when therapy still carries stigma in some Asian households. Stories allow individuals to reflect on the past with compassion, reframe painful experiences, and make meaning out of survival. Graphic memoirs like All Our Ordinary Stories by Teresa Wong help normalize this process. Through art and narrative, Wong sheds light on what it means to grow up with silence, obligation, and love all coexisting in a single household.Therapists who work with Asian American clients must move away from pathologizing and toward contextualizing. That means acknowledging how a client’s perfectionism, people-pleasing, or guilt might not be dysfunction—but a response to their cultural and familial environment. It also means working from a place of cultural humility: listening with curiosity, validating lived experiences, and affirming cultural strengths like collectivism, community resilience, and emotional endurance.
A Memoir That Resonates with Our Real Lives
In her conversation with therapist Megan Soun on Yellow Chair Collective’s Asian Mental Health Book Club, Teresa Wong discusses the process of writing her memoir and how storytelling became a way of healing. The episode explores themes like parental acceptance, the immigrant experience, imposter syndrome, and what it means to write through generational pain with empathy rather than blame.
Whether you are an aspiring writer, therapist, or someone navigating your own family dynamics, this discussion offers powerful insight into the shared experiences of many Asian American families. It reminds us that healing is not just personal—it’s collective.
🎧 Listen to the conversation between Megan Soun & Teresa Wong
👉 Asian Mental Health Book Club | All Our Ordinary Stories
📚 Attend the next Asian Mental Health Book Club
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Seek An Individual Therapist at Yellow Chair Collective in Los Angeles or New York
If you are seeking therapy specifically tailored to your needs, consider reaching out to the therapists at Yellow Chair Collective. We understand that there may be unique contextual factors that may influence your experiences.
At our Los Angeles, CA, and New York City, NY-based therapy practice, we have many skilled, trauma-informed, and culturally sensitive therapists who can provide an empowering therapeutic experience. For your added convenience and simplicity, we offer online therapy for anyone in the state of California or New York. We know that navigating your mental health journey can be challenging, and we want to support you along the way. Follow the steps below to begin.
- Fill out the contact form to get connected with us.
- Get matched with one of our culturally sensitive therapists.
- Start the next step in your healing journey today.
Other Services at Yellow Chair Collective
There are many options for treatment using online therapy in California and New York, it just depends on what you’re needing. And while we certainly service Asian American folks, we also work with individuals from other cultures, too. So, whether you’re needing support in overcoming anxiety, burnout, trauma, or PTSD, we can help. Likewise, we serve teens and couples in need of support, too. So when you start online therapy with us, you can bring your whole self, including past struggles, cultural impacts, and more.
